8:39 AM - Thursday, Apr. 21, 2005
the grapes of wrath
It has been done. My cats have been declawed. And I couldn't be more sick to my stomach if I had the stomach flu. I am so encased with guilt over their pain that I tossed and turned all night. I have been to the bathroom 5 times already to release the bile from my throat. I am so sick that I couldn't fit into my jeans this morning from being bloated with water due to stress. From the moment that I picked up my dear little kitties from the vet, I have been a slave to this feeling. It's because of how loving they have been to me, as if grateful that I have saved them from being shipped off and sent away. They treat me as if I am their savior, when it is I who sent them off to this fate. I can only hope that their paws heal quickly. I will never put them through any sort of pain again as long as I shall live.
